Humility

I've had some really good few days- but today was terrific. We (my coworker and I) got to do a presentation at a little University in the suburbs about immigration. The group that invited us called the event "Immigration 101" and it was super political and I think interesting. I modified this Immigration History Timeline I had received when I went to the leadership training and through it I was able to talk explicitly about race and about capitalism. We had some good discussion afterward and I felt successful when one girl asked "What is the point of even becoming a citizen?" in the context of how the US has and does treat immigration. Researching for the presentation was pretty interesting. There are some really outrageous examples of human/civil rights abuse with ICE raids, with introducing a guest worker program in New Orleans while at the same time raiding and deporting hundreds of workers.... it's actually unbelievable that anyone can not only tolerate but support this crap.

It was also interesting to talk about how to present such information. My coworker (who is older and has a lot of experience in international solidarity work) kept pushing the point afterward that you have to "meet people where they're at" in the context of speaking "softly"- not in volume but in content, so they hear what you have to say. But I'm so resistant to modifying how I come across. I want people to hear words like anti-capitalist and anarchist and zapatista and autonomy in a positive context. And I want to call out racism when I see it and say things like "that's wrong" when referring to lousy historical policies.... I guess it must be balance but I get tired of couching things in a pretty way. I've never been very good at that.

I did some reading recently about the arguments between Marxism and Anarchism and I realize why I have a hard time defining myself: mostly because I'm a bit of both and then some. I do analyze every injustice back to the evils of capitalist economics (Marxist) but also believe that it's not about replacing the existing power structure with workers, but abolishing existing power structures entirely (Anarchy). All with a dash of feminism (and abolishing patriarchy seems Anarchist and isn't adressed with Marxism) and zapatismo and corryness.

And the best thing that happened today was unexpected. I'm now coteaching an ESL class on Tuesday nights and we are trying hard to manifest the principals of Popular Education. I'm relying heavily of how I was taught in the Zapatista language school and today I think I really got the hang of it. The students wanted to talk about work, to learn work related phrases and such. They were at an intermediate level so they had some English already. We started talking about salary and that lead to some great conversation about how much people earn in different countries, why people can't earn the same in their home countries (in this case Mexico and Ecuador), which lead into a discussion about the ownership of the means of production, which lead into talking about how folks came here (they were all undocumented). One woman shared a lot about her struggle which affected me quite a bit. A lot of hardship and danger and strength. She talked about not wanting to live but living for her daughters... and I started talking about the Immigration talk I gave today and we talked about the rights of immigrants and I shared a comic I found about immigrant rights and the woman was spellbound.... she was saying that she didn't know anything the rights she was entitled to and that she lived in fear, not necessarily of deportation but that deportation would separate her from her family.

It hit me hard on so many levels. On the level that people shouldn't have to deal with crap like that no matter where they come from. That not only should they be able to surivive in their own country but that there is no way they should have to live in fear in the very same country that is making the economic situation in their home country unbearable just to put food on their table. It also hit me that she is not the only one with this story- in fact she's one of way too many. And it also hit me that she was willing to share her story with us, and try to tell some of it in English even. That she felt safe with us, with me, with the atmosphere we created in that room, in that moment. It was amazing to feel 'popular education' happening. That we shared something, her story, some English words, the information about the rights she had, the emotion... it works. Political education like this works when it is pertinent and real. I honestly can't describe how it feels. I felt it in Oventic at the Zapatista language school, this overwhelming feeling of I'm really learning, I'm understanding... and without being to sappy

it felt like justice

I want to sit with this a while. And I know I want to keep doing it. I like that I'm learning how to do it, that my social skills and my teaching skills can be put together with my political understanding and that it can be shared.... it's nice to feel like I have something to contribute at the same time I'm gaining an understanding of something. It feels so good.